


Bottom of the Bottle

by waywardmoeyy



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alcohol, Castiel x Reader Fluff, Castiel x Reader angst, Drinking, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-22
Updated: 2018-11-22
Packaged: 2019-08-27 10:43:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,210
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16700977
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/waywardmoeyy/pseuds/waywardmoeyy





	Bottom of the Bottle

You lifted the nearly weightless bottle to your lips. One more shot. The whiskey burned down your throat as you slammed the empty bottle onto the library table. Watching Castiel ignore you every day was becoming too much. Seven months of forced greetings and lack of concern on the angel’s part. It was getting old, getting painful.  
Your blurred gaze met the empty bottle you had opened just over an hour ago, downing the entire beverage in one go. The large bottle was enough to get you and the brothers all shit faced. And, it was enough to do the job you had intended for it.  
Dean, Sam, and the angel had just returned from a lengthy job. All of them retreated to their rooms without so much as a “hello”. You closed your eyes for a moment as your fingers fiddled with the empty bottle. You didn’t mean anything to them anymore. They hadn’t even asked you to assist them on the last two jobs, both of which had lasted over a week. You were just a roommate to them now, and absolutely nothing to the angel you loved.  
Your stomach swished as you struggled to focus on the bottle in front of you. Shit, here it comes. Your plan was working. You stumbled as you stood from your chair, gripping the bottle as you staggered to the bathroom, as if the now empty object would provide some comfort.  
You made it to the bathroom just in time, violently vomiting into the toilet before you could kneel in front of it. The bottom of the empty bottle smacked the counter as you struggled to hold yourself above the toilet. You let out a strangled cry as more came up. You turned to the bathroom door, which was slightly ajar. Springing a leg free from under you, you kicked the door shut with a loud thud, much louder than you were intending. Before you could worry about someone hearing you, another episode of vomiting hit you like a tidal wave. You gripped the sides of the porcelain oval as tears streamed down your face. It will all be over soon. You could feel your awareness fading as you slowly slipped towards unconsciousness.  
The bathroom door swung open. You turned your clouded gaze to a khaki blur, followed by red and black plaid, and a much taller flash of denim.  
“Y/N,” you heard a low, gravelly voice echo in your ears. “What’s going on?”  
You wiped your mouth before turning to what must have been Castiel. “You don’t need me,” you slurred. “You don’t care.” Your fuzzy gaze lifted to the bottle on the counter before turning back to the toilet for another episode.  
“Sweetheart, you didn’t drink all of this, did you?” Dean picked up the bottle. His voice sounded distant, almost as if he were under water. You just nodded as you continued to be sick.  
“Y/N, that will kill you,” Sam’s voice sounded even more distant than Dean’s. Your vision blacked out for a moment before returning to it’s blurred, white state.  
You chuckled as you wiped your face again. “That’s the idea.” Then, your vision blacked out again, sending you tumbling to the ground. You gasped for air as you laid on your back, fighting the urge to vomit. “Screw you,” you snarled before another wave hit you.  
“Y/N!” Castiel screamed. He knelt down beside you as you began to shake uncontrollably. “She’s having a seizure. Stay clear. Get me a wet towel, now!” Cas barked. Sam raced from the room to the small linen closet down the hall.  
“What the hell is happening, Cas?” Dean growled as he squatted a few feet away, his eyes locked on you.  
“Alcohol poisoning. If she drank that whole bottle, she doesn’t have long.” Cas turned to you as he heard a gurgling cough. “She’s aspirating. Y/N!” Cas closed his eyes as he concentrated on his grace. Then, he placed two fingers gently on your forehead.  
Within a few seconds, you shot up from the floor, gasping as you took in your surroundings. “Cas?” The angel leaned you back against the cool wall, keeping his hands on your shoulders.  
“Y/N, what the hell happened?” Cas’s voice was stern, making you wince.  
You lowered your head. “You—You weren’t supposed to see this,” was all you could muster before tears began to trail down your cheeks.  
“May I talk with Y/N alone please?” Cas turned to Dean, who nodded. Sam handed Cas a towel before following his brother out the door. Then, Cas turned to you. His expression quickly switched from anger to concern as he knelt closer to you. “Please tell me you weren’t trying to kill yourself.” His words caused a knot in your chest as you gazed into his gorgeous blue eyes. You simply nodded. Cas let out a deep breath, closing his eyes for a moment as reality hit him. “What would compel you to attempt something like that?”  
You squeezed your eyes shut, forcing out tears before peering back up at the man you loved. “I don’t mean anything to any of you. Dean and Sam have been ignoring me lately and you, you barely acknowledge my existence in the first place. You don’t even talk to me unless you need something,” you growled as you turned away from the angel.  
You gasped as his fingers gently steered your chin back to meet his gaze. “Y/N, I see you. I see you for the amazing hunter you are. I see you for the loyal friend you are to the Winchesters.” Cas smiled softly. “And I see you for your overwhelming beauty.”  
Beauty? Your breath hitched as the word sank in. “Y—You think I’m beautiful?”  
Castiel nodded. “More than anything I’ve ever seen in my many years of existence. I just wish you saw yourself the way I see you.” Cas pulled you against him, placing a light kiss on top of your head. You leaned into him as your tears turned to sobs.  
“Why did you ignore me?” You moved to study Cas’s expression.  
Cas bit his lip. “Because I didn’t know where to begin. Love is not something I’ve experienced. At least, not for a single being. I didn’t know how to express my feelings, so I remained silent.” Cas stroked the top of your head as he held you close. “But I almost lost you today. If you had died, I wouldn’t have had the power to bring you back. I’m so glad I walked in when I did.”  
You nodded as you leaned against his chest, listening to his rapid heartbeat. The light, quick thuds soothed you as you repeated his words in your head. He loved you.  
“Thank you, Cas.” Your voice was little more than a whisper.  
Cas shuffled under you, lifting you to stand. “You should rest. Let’s get you to bed. I’ll bring a wet towel in to help you clean up.”  
You nodded as Cas escorted you towards the door. You paused for a moment, gripping his hand. “Cas, stay with me tonight? I-I don’t want to be alone.”  
Cas smiled before placing a kiss on your forehead. “Of course.”


End file.
